Rob's Screwy News Wednesday
Mar 14th, 2012
Ranking American cities by their barbeque seems like a DEATH WISH, because so many people are insanely passionate on the subject. But "U.S. News & World Report" went for it anyway. They ranked Memphis, Tennessee as the best, ahead of Lockhart, Texas and Kansas City, Missouri.
A 32-year-old paroled drug dealer near London was convicted of having amphetamines when police raided his home. So he's going back to prison . . . but not right away. A judge delayed his sentencing because the guy is donating a kidney to his 23-year-old brother. He'll have the surgery in a few weeks, then have a few months to recover before being sentenced in November.
On Saturday, a 63-year-old editor from the Portland newspaper "The Oregonian" died of a heart attack. And in his obituary, the paper revealed exactly HOW he died . . . after GETTING-IT-ON with a 23-year-old mistress who was using him to buy her stuff. He's survived by his wife and three daughters . . . who are probably pretty angry at his former employer right now.
St. Patrick's Day is on Saturday, which means this year, you don't even have to take off work to get hammered at eight in the morning. And a lot of people are going to take advantage of that.
According to the National Retail Federation, 54% of Americans plan on celebrating St. Patrick's Day in some way this year. They'll each spend an average of $35, for an all-time record of $4.55 BILLION.
After 244 years, Encyclopedia Britannica will stop printing . . . and, yeah, Wikipedia gets most of the blame