Signs He's Undateable
Mar 30th, 2010
SIGNS HE'S UNDATEABLE
(US Weekly) Phone clips and spandex shorts? Not even celebs can get away with style slipups cited in the new book "Undateable," written "Marriage Ref" producer Ellen Rakieten and interior designer Anne Coyle:
- He wears tighty whities -- Boyish briefs are a buzzkill, solo or peeking out of a waistband. Coauthor Ellen Rakieten advises guys to "invest in boxers or boxer briefs."
- He carries a Murse -- Contents: cellphone, comb and what's left of his male pride. "No guy can rock this," says Rakieten. "It's way cooler to have a messenger bag."
- He struts his stuff in spandex -- Some times are best kept under wraps, like, say, a man's package. "Women don't want to see all that," says Rakieten. Only avid cyclists can wear these shorts.
- He dons a Mankin -- The ego has landed. "Wearing a banana hammock screams, 'I need attention,'" says Rakieten. And it's not easy on the eyes. "It doesn't flatter anybody."
- He's a wannabe gangsta -- K-Fed's got the baggy pants and bling. But street cred? Zero. "He's a good looking guy underneath all that," says coauthor Anne Coyle.
- He's got a Chewbacca back -- Bare skin that resembles a mohair sweater belongs in the primate cage at the local zoo. "Men should maintain themselves like we do," Rakieten says. "They should wax or keep it hidden."
- He holsters his phone -- The message is clear: The Bachelor has bad taste. "Anything clipped on, including a tie, is dorky," says Rakieten. Adds Coyle, "We all have calls coming in, but your phone shouldn't be strapped to you like a gun."
- He has bad jeans -- Ripped jeans are for starlets, not grown men, says Coyle. Before leaving the house, he should ask, "Do these jeans make me look lame?"